


Adult Content

by d2fmeasurement



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-04-01 15:12:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4024606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d2fmeasurement/pseuds/d2fmeasurement
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place during "Adult Content." Gilfoyle seduces Dinesh after Erlich steals Dinesh's Tinder date.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Adult Content

“That’s the funny thing about earrings,” Gilfoyle said. “They’re always in the last place you look.”

Dinesh didn’t even look over at him. Gilfoyle walked up to him and put his hand on his shoulder. “Why are you out here where you can hear his music?”

“My room is next to his. In there I can...feel the headboard against the wall...” Dinesh said, cringing.

“That’s rough,” Gilfoyle said. “Come into my room.”

Dinesh sighed and followed him. He sat down on the bed. Gilfoyle started blasting some Rites of Spring. Dinesh was surprised to realize that he actually couldn’t hear Erlich. “Thanks,” he said.

“No problem,” Gilfoyle said, sitting down next to him on the bed. “Sorry you didn’t get to lose your v-card, buddy.”

Dinesh frowned and said, “I’m not...”

“You seemed very nervous when Karen said she could come over,” Gilfoyle told him.

“That was-- our house was a mess,” he said. “I was nervous that I wouldn’t get to sleep with her.”

“Okay,” Gilfoyle said agreeably.

Dinesh knew that Gilfoyle was evil and absolutely the last person he should open up to, but he couldn’t help it. He turned to him and softly asked, “What if it never happens? I mean...fuck, I’m at the point where I’m afraid of it? You’re supposed to get all of the being terrible at it out of the way when you’re in college.”

“High school even,” Gilfoyle said.

Dinesh sighed, unsurprised that Gilfoyle was aggressively unhelpful.

“I’m just saying. I was like 16. I beat you by like...half our lifetime.”

Dinesh buried his head in his hands.

“If you’re scared...I don’t think you should do it with some girl you met on Tinder and had to lie to,” Gilfoyle told him.

Dinesh looked up and furrowed his eyebrows. He was sure that Gilfoyle must be somehow making fun of him, but he didn’t exactly know how.

“I just think you seem like you want to be with someone you care about. And you definitely deserve to be with someone who won’t make you feel like you’re terrible at it.”

“I will be terrible at it. I mean, I’ve read up on it and watched videos, you know of...” He held up his fingers in a vaguely crude gesture.

“What I mean is that if someone cares about you, they won’t think of it as you being terrible at it. They’d think...this guy is trying and we’re touching each other and kissing and just being with each other is nice. Everything-- the stuff they teach you about in whatever fucking pathetic videos you’re watching-- it’s secondary. You’ll figure it out.”

“Why are you acting...like a sensitive human? Don’t you want to make fun of me about this,” he said.

“No,” Gilfoyle said, simply. “I don’t think the shit you do early in your life defines you. You could be some incredibly nerdy Pakistani kid spending every single minute studying or you can be a straight edge Canadian kid who gets convinced to break his promises to never drink, never do drugs and never have sex all in one night by a fucking monster with pierced nipples. Either way, you end up in the same place.”

“The same place, except one of you is a virgin and one...”

“What? Has had a bunch of meaningless relationships? Who cares?”

“You think every relationship you’ve had was meaningless?”

“Not at the time. At the time, all of those women were perfect. You know, in my eyes they were Satan...” Dinesh started to furrow his eyebrows, but then remembered that Gilfoyle meant that in a good way and nodded. “...but, now, yeah. I think they’re meaningless. Just like the fact that you’ve never stuck your dick in anything with a pulse is meaningless. None of that stuff is as fundamental to who we are as it feels.”

“Well, that’s nice to think, but I still feel like it’s hanging over me. As this thing that’s going to be so awkward and embarrassing, but I have to do it if I ever want to skip to the part where I’m just comfortable with someone and it’s fun.”

“You really don’t think it’s possible to skip to that part?”

“No. Because every woman expects me to be an actual proper man in his 30s who knows what he’s doing.”

“What if you knew someone who likes you the way you are?” Gilfoyle asked.

“Is this a fucking episode of a 90s sitcom? That doesn’t happen,” Dinesh reminded him.

“I like you the way you are,” Gilfoyle told him.

“Great your friendship means the world to me,” Dinesh said sarcastically.

“I like you,” Gilfoyle said. “Sexually.”

Dinesh stared at him. “Oh my god, fuck you. I thought you were genuinely trying to make me feel better and it was all a fucking set up to mess with me?”

“I’m not messing with you,” he said. “I don’t expect you to do anything, I’m just telling you that it’s on the table.”

“Mm. Great. Can you go?” Dinesh asked.

“It’s my room,” Gilfoyle reminded him.

Dinesh nodded and got up. He reluctantly went back to his bedroom, telling himself he could try and get some sleep. He laid down and immediately heard the headboard banging against the wall. He went back to Gilfoyle’s room and knocked on the door.

Gilfoyle opened the door. “Hey,” he said, in his usual monotone, with his usual blank stare.  
“How do you fucking do that? After what you told me, you’re just totally calm and fine?”

“I’m not calm. I’m wondering whether or not I have any chance whatsoever with someone I have very strong romantic feelings for,” Gilfoyle told him. “And by wondering, I mean painfully aware that I probably don’t.”

“Oh,” Dinesh said.

“Yeah. Sorry if I’m not expressing that to your liking,” Gilfoyle said.

“Can I come in?” Dinesh asked.

Gilfoyle nodded and let him in.

Dinesh took a while to figure out what he wanted to say. “I am...willing to try it. I might hate it.”

“You really know how to woo a person,” Gilfoyle said. He sat down on the bed and patted the spot next to him. Dinesh sat down.

They sat there, not looking at each other or saying anything until the room fell silent.

“My playlist ended,” Gilfoyle said.

“You should start a new one,” Dinesh said. Gilfoyle got up to do that. “And then we should kiss.”

“I agree,” Gilfoyle said. He started his playlist over and then sat down next to Dinesh again. “Ready?”

“Yeah,” Dinesh said nervously. He closed his eyes. Gilfoyle lightly kissed him. When Gilfoyle pulled away, Dinesh opened his eyes and softly said, “That was fucking great.” Gilfoyle grinned at him.

Gilfoyle kissed up his neck and asked, “Do you want your dick sucked?”

Dinesh let out a breath. “Yeah! I mean, yeah. More than anything.”

Gilfoyle smiled and said, “Do you see what I mean about being with someone you’re comfortable with? Who you don’t want to find excuses to not be with?” He petted Dinesh’s hair.

“Do I have to admit that you’re right to get my dick sucked?” Dinesh asked with a pout.

Gilfoyle laughed as he moved to his knees in front of Dinesh. “That’s okay.” He unzipped Dinesh’s pants and Dinesh lifted his hips up and helped him get them down along with his underwear.

“Have you done this before?” Dinesh asked curiously.

“Nope. And I haven’t watched any fucking instructional videos either,” Gilfoyle said. “I’m just hoping for the best.”

He started sucking on it and pulled his head away after a minute. “Sorry. That was different than I imagined.”

“It’s okay,” Dinesh said breathily, waiting for Gilfoyle to decide what to do next.

Gilfoyle started sucking it again.

Dinesh let out a slow breath. “That feels so good. Holy shit.”

Gilfoyle bobbed his head for a while, finding an angle he was comfortable with. He sucked hard as Dinesh moaned.

“Gilfoyle!” he moaned, pulling on his hair a little. “I’m almost done,” he said softly. Gilfoyle pulled away and jerked him off for a second before he came.

Gilfoyle grinned and said, “I never thought that in a million years I would ever actually hear you moan my name.” He climbed onto the bed next to him as Dinesh pulled his underwear back up and slid his pants all the way off.

“I never thought I’d ejaculate with another person in the room,” Dinesh said.

“Do you care that it was me?” Gilfoyle asked. “Either way, good or bad. Does it make a difference to you? I just want you to be honest.”

“Yeah, Gilfoyle,” he said. “You...you’re a fucking badass. I mean, you saved the company with that ninja shit today. You built an entire fucking server by hand in our garage. You never want to go out to have fun and you’ve never in my life told me to cheer up, be less mean or think positive. You have dark hair and you’re tall and...” He ran his eyes over him, “...and have a really nice body. You seem very dominant...if I had to describe my perfect woman, it would probably be you. As weird as that is to think about.”

Gilfoyle kissed him and Dinesh happily kissed back. “You don’t have to commit to anything for us to keep fooling around like this. If you want to keep going on Tinder all the time...”

“No, that’s a fucking wasteland and it’s killing my soul,” Dinesh said. He pulled Dinesh close and ran his hand down his back before moving it back up.

Gilfoyle smiled. “Did you just almost touch my ass and then get nervous?”

Dinesh nodded.

“Go ahead.”

Dinesh smiled as he felt Gilfoyle’s ass. “You’re really sexy,” he said, sounding half-grateful and half-surprised. “I want you to be my boyfriend.”

Gilfoyle grinned and pulled him into an aggressive kiss.


End file.
